If you aren't planning on driving the car hard, you'll probably be fine without the hardened seats. I ran my '68 for years with the original heads on 93 unleaded and didn't have any problems with burned valves. If you are going install new valves I'd go ahead and have the hardened seats installed. There are additives out there (I used to use one called CD-2) but I don't really know how well they work. As a whole, I'm pretty skeptical of fuel additives.
I'm not sure what you mean by "Pontiac heads don't have valve stem seals like Fords." Do you mean they appear differently or are installed differently? Pontiacs definitely do have valve stem seals. I'm not familiar with Fords so I can't say how they compare functionally.
If you haven't already, I'd recommend buying a copy of Jim Hand's book "How to Build High Performance Pontiac V8s" while you are rebuilding your engine. Lots of good info in there, well worth the $20. There's also tons of good info and knowledgeable folks over on the
performanceyears.com boards. The boards over there are geared towards older Pontiacs so you'll get answers to your questions a lot faster. I've learned a lot from those guys over the years.